To NaNo Or Not To NaNo?

I’d basically decided not to do NaNoWriMo this year, but after several unproductive weeks I’m questioning that decision.  For those of you who don’t know (heathens!) NaNoWriMo stands for National Novel Writing Month, and it’s essentially a competition to see who can write a 50,000+ word novel in one month.  The prize is a feeling of self-worth.

I entered for the past two years, and “won” both times with The Long Road Home (2010) and Cobault (2009).  Neither were finished to my exacting standards, and I’ve spent a lot of time trying to edit Cobault and failing to complete it, since it required heavy rewriting, but at least I could say I had two new novels under my belt which taught me a lot about the process.

Because I’ve been so unmotivated to write, but then guilty and upset with myself for not doing so, I think that, while I don’t believe my current project itself is fit to be written in a month, it would kickstart me back into writing regularly again.  My only decision will be what to write.

I’m nervous about trying to write my new project in this way because, as I’ve stated, I don’t think this is a story which can be rushed.  Writing a novel in a month is the very definition of rushing.  But that’s the story I currently have in my head, so the question is: should I put it aside, or just go for it anyway?

You might say, “just try it, and edit it later if its crap”, but I got stuck with Cobault in that later editing stage and got so frustrated with it that I never properly finished.  When huge chunks need rewriting completely and other chunks need to be reintegrated it makes my mind hurt trying to put them all together!  But maybe this is something I just need practice with as well?

Whatever the case, in 3 days time I will be embarking upon the hectic, frantic, repetitive-stress-injury-laden task of writing a novel once more, because my lazy mind needs some kicking up the arse.